At some point in all of our lives we have been told we need to compromise. We have to compromise in every aspect of our lives. As women we have to compromise for men. As black people we have to compromise to everyone. We compromise our religious beliefs, our sexuality, our education level, everything seems to be a compromise these days. If I am an educated, strong, confident black woman why can’t I just be who I was created to be? Why must I compromise to make the next person feel good about himself or herself?
Compromise is supposed to be beneficial to all parties involved unfortunately that is not always the case. At some point the compromise will lend toward one person’s favor. Then that is not a compromise or is it? One definition of compromise is to accept standards that are lower than is desirable. History helps us to prove this point time and time again. Take a look at voting rights during the 1960s and even today. Many black people were told they could vote but…… The compromise was y’all can vote everything after the but shows that the compromise is going in the favor of the one creating the compromise.
Does anyone really every compromise or do we simply tell people what they want to hear? More often than not people push their own agendas and say “Let’s compromise” and in a fit of ignorance the compromising party believes they are actually in some way winning or at least being considered. Many people who say they are compromising are simply putting in a few words the other party wants to hear but ultimately pushing their own agenda.
The most important part of most compromises is the outcome. When in actuality the most important part should be making all parties involved happy or feel like part of the decision making process. One thing is for sure the word “settle” or some variation of the word is found in almost every definition of the word compromise. Let’s make sure we are compromising and not settling because clearly there is a thin line between the two.